My brother emails me today about a problem he has. He wants me to tell our mom about it because he thinks she's going to be angry.
Never mind that he's an adult and it shouldn't matter what my mom thinks. It matters to him.
When I respond, I remind him of bad decisions I've made in the past. I tell him that mom may have been upset, but not angry at me.
I see the discussion from a different perspective now. After all, someday my child might feel the same way about me. I know I want her to feel loved even when she makes bad choices.
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